the commodification of 'cool'

why buying your way into an identity doesn't really work anymore, and what 'cool' really means these days

someone recently asked me if I thought I was cool.

the idea of ‘cool’ is interesting — I associate the term with my two older sisters who I thought were the coolest people ever growing up (and still do!). they were cool to me because they were my older sisters, of course, and if you’re the youngest of three sisters, you’ll understand what I mean. everything they did, from the colour of ipod nano they chose to the thrifted sweatshirts they wore to school, oozed cool to me. I wanted to be them so bad that I would sneak into their wardrobes and take pieces of their clothing, hoping they wouldn’t notice (they always did).

but now how do we define ‘cool’ in an era where we can buy our way into identities?

‘that girl’ became a thing on tiktok around the same time my economic thesis research outline was due, and I serendipitously decided to research the idea of conspicuous consumption in my senior year.

conspicuous consumption is the act of purchasing and using luxury goods to publicly display wealth and social status, coined by Thorstein Veblen¹.

for those unfamiliar, here is the vibe of ‘that girl.’ collage taken from pinterest.

my senior research, titled ‘conspicuous wellness’² sought to understand how people can buy their way into an identity. the stuff we owned and the language we chose was a signal of our membership: “that girl” wore matching workout sets, went to reformer pilates, and had a 10-step korean skincare routine. never mind that the concept came about to describe the highest version of yourself; once capitalism got its grimy hands on it, it turned into something you could purchase.

now I’m not saying that the coquette or cottagecore girls you see on your feed aren’t ‘cool,’ they very well could be. what I’m saying is that these micro-trend identities have become synonymous with capitalism. you can signal your membership in an identity subgroup as easily as changing your outfit.

this was less-prominent before social media, where membership in an identity group often required some level of commitment (think of high school groups, where emo kids have certain hairstyles or nerds are mathlete champions. it used to be much harder to flow between two identity groups, so much so that high school musical was a commentary on how a jock could be a singer). cool had a look, and you either were or you weren’t.

high school musical 2 (2007). what a phenomenal set of movies.

but going back to the original question: what is cool?

in the conversation, this person defined cool as being ahead of trends and always having their finger on the pulse. if someone could accurately predict the next big thing, they were often seen as weird until it became popular, and then they were seen as cool. in essence, coolness can be defined as the early adopters, those who shun what is popular in favour of what is coming.

but there are levels to this. if popular culture is level 0, then level 1 is someone who baby steps away from popular culture in some aspect. they’re mainstream by definition except for a very particular interest. but then, their ‘coolness’ hinges on their particular interest actually making it mainstream. level 2 is a cut above that, and so on, and so forth.

pics from pinterest I think ooze cool

so if I’m standing at the bottom, looking up at this ladder which stretches to the heavens, then at what level can I be considered ‘cool?’

the thesis of this essay is that ‘cool’ is the enlightened version of this state. instead of pegging coolness to whether or not your interests are going to become mainstream and how far ahead you were able to predict this trend, coolness is simply rejecting your relation to popular culture.

the coolest people are the most confident versions of themselves. they know what they bring to the table. they’re not afraid of being seen as weird. they don’t have to scream that they “knew this artist before they got famous!!!!” on social media — they probably don’t even have social media³.

am I cool? I don’t know. I still think that coolness has to be defined in relation to others. I recognize that there will always be people higher up on the cool ladder than me (both of my sisters, for instance). but I also acknowledge that I am the most sure of myself that I have been, and therefore I am the most cool version of myself.

(side note: rewiring my relationship with social media has fundamentally changed how I interact with the world around me. I’ve unintentionally gotten off the ladder I mentioned just because I have no idea what’s trending right now, and that has allowed me to step into myself more. (i.e. I’ve stopped defining myself by my place on the societal ‘cool’ ladder and I’ve embraced what makes me ME without any external input). it has also curbed my need to (over)consume, as I’m not bombarded with ads for the newest coat or the best running shoes on the market. I recognize that there is a privilege to being offline and I have a lot of thoughts about this new ‘offline’ revolution as a content creator with 138k on instagram, but I’ll save that for another essay.)

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thank you for reading my messy thoughts — the ‘still warm’ takes on society, social media, and navigating adulthood.

if you’re interested in personal wellness, that’s housed here

& see my visual content about being in my 20s on instagram ⭐️

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I’ve previously written about getting off my phone and reducing the level of stimulation in my life which you can read below. I’m moving my essays from that substack to this one! I hope you consider sticking around :)

a mini 1: it really is your phone

a mini 1: I want my time back

1. from investopedia if you’re interested in reading more :)

2. you can read my senior thesis via this link. she’s a little rough and needs some fixing, but has really good bones and interesting theory behind it.

3. a related but tangential point is that being offline is the new version of ‘cool.’ I watched a video essay this morning about how being offline signals wealth because it signals leisure time and discipline over dopamine/stimulation. 15 minutes and a great watch.